Post by № on Dec 16, 2006 6:18:04 GMT -5
One day Kulock was walking through the woods when he saw a tree falling! It was then, the thought occurred to him - "If a tree falls in the forest, and I'm in the forest, do I hear it?" It fell on him. Crap. Kulock, trapped by the tree, summoned his sailor powers, and became Sailor...coffee. He then killed all who opposed him.So he really didn't kill anyone. Except for Andre Dirk, that is. Even though he didn't oppose him, Sailor Coffee didn't like him.
Little did Andre know, that Kulock was secretly plotting revenge against SoSTH, but then, suddenly he needed to go to the toilet. Bad. Kulock, escaping from under the tree, ran to the nearest bathroom. Unfortunately, though, it was occupied by...no-one. However, ROTORO DROPPED THRU THE ROOF! So, the potty was ruined. "Great..." thought Kulock. "Now what'll I do?" So he deducted that he must rough it. Searching for a nice patch of bushes, Kulock happened to bump into Big. Big then said "I gotta drop a log twice as big as you, Kuku-kachoo, shove off!" So he pushed Ku out of the way and went into the bathroom. Kulock then got angry, and got out his WAND OF ENLIGHTENMENT! (Oo, too close for comfort..)
But it was to late, and big crapped on him! Kulock then took his wand of enlightenment, cocked it, aimed it at big, and shot many bullets of enlightenment at his fat ass. With Big dead, nothing could stop Kulock from going to the can to "sit and think". However, he could not think of anything of which to think about. He then got a grand plan to destroy Sonic.
Kulock, while sitting on the can, devising how to destroy Sonic, got a weird feeling on his underside. Bunnie came up from the toilet, and said, "Who wants candy?" Kulock, embarassed, did the only thing he could do. He jumped up, wiped, blushed, and stared at Bunnie drooling, in a lovestruck Pok�mon "Brock"-ish way. He said "Oh Bunnie, I know you got candy, but I sure would like you to lick my lollipop..." while licking his lips. Bunnie slapped him with her robotic hand, and Kulock exploded. Because he felt like it. Anyway, then Scott decided to Watch E.R.! But then when he watched it, he saw Kulock getting dragged in the hospital.
"Go to Knothole!" said the radio. "Whatever." agreed Scott. So he climbed upon Yuji Naka, and rode him like a horse until he got to Knothole. When he got there, he met Rotoro! He liked JUMPIN THRU ROOFS! So he did. Then, Scott sicced Naka on Rotoro. Yuji was pissed off, so he killed the rotor clone. Then he killed the real one. Unfortunately, Naka-sama had gone out of control, and Scott had to put a bullet in him. Scott then heard somebody crying over his death. Alas, it was Burny. Burny was a fire sponge, so Scott ate it. He got heartburn.
But then, Burny turned out to be Mr. Burns, who crawled out of Scotty's stomach, and called Smithers. Smithers then challenged Scott to a duel to the death. Scott was losing when he pulled out his gun, the same that he had used to kill Yuji with, and promptly shot Smithers and Mr. Burns square between the eyes. "Nobody liked that old fart and his pet fag anyway." He said. he was then attacked by an unruly group of Simpsons fans. He got ran over. Flat as a pancake, Scott decided to go on with his opriginal task, going to Kulock at E.R. When he got there, he saw Kulock, doing the monkey! "Kulock! This is no time for dancing, and -- how did they put you back together, I thought you blew up?" "Well, yeah..." said Kulock, "but I was lucky that I was treated by Dr. Magic bean." Magic bean then Killed Scott for no reason.
H-hog then ate Magic Bean. But since magic bean could not be digested, he lived on in H Hog's stomach forever. From inside H Hog, Magic Bean started up the Magic Mean Bean Machine, and magic beans came streaming out of his ass. H Hog, unfortunately, lost his balance by the immense amount of beans exiting his ass and accidentally sat down. With no where for the beans to go, H exploded in a bloody beany mess.
Kulock then exploded. Rlan, pissed off at the predictability of the narrator, killed him with a golf club. But then, Rlan's golf club got bent. "GET BENT!" he said to it, realizing it already was. So he tossed it away, and walked out of the hospital, wondering what he was doing there in the first place. H Hog got up with a big hole in his stomach, and Rlan found a magic bean. "What a nice looking bean you are." and it said, "All the better to get eaten for." So he ate it. Rlan exploded.
Jun Senoue runs in, mourns over Rlan's dead body, and is shot by Neo in Cop form. "That's a 1-30-484-292 violation, mourning over peoples' deaths." Soon after that Neo was president. Because He felt like being president. As president, he made everyone some yummy coconut cream pies. And there was much rejoicing. Then, Leo killed Neo. H Hog was looking the other way, and one last magic bean shot out and killed Leo. H Hog, mysteriously come back to life, proceeded to explode.
Leaving not many characters left, we pick one at random. Pikachu decided to take a walk through a forest. Then he fell down a cliff. While yelling "PIIIIKAAAA....", he fell down towards a messy demise. But just then the floor was there already, and Pikachu's head collided with it. (Like we expected.)
Being the bloody mess that he was, Pikachu proceeded to die in peace. Mourning over him, was Ash Ketchup. Team Submarine then came along and said "Prepare for--" They were stopped by the now regenerated Scott, who'd gone rambo, and was riding in a tank. He blasted Team Submarine and Ash Ketchup in one well placed shot. "OH SHIT! WHERE ARE THE BRAKES?" Scott yelled. Alas, he couldn't find them, and slammed into the cliff and exploded.
But then, the add-on was changed to the friendly fun fun happy show of goodness. Everyone came back to life. Then they started dancing. Then Foggy and Brick came along and got shot by the now regenerated Kulock. "Dammit! This TOTALLY screws over happy fun time!" said the narrator. "Screw Happy Fun Time!" said Ku, before commiting genocide on the magic beans. All of the magic beans died. Happy happy fun time was changed to happy happy kill time. Kulock turned into a crazed axe murderer. He chopped up everyone in sight. Suddenly, in a moment of clumsy dramatism and irony, Kulock slipped, and accidentally sliced Bunnie in half. Kulock was crushed to see he had killed his love.
Except who was actually Mr. Burns, he didn't die by the axe. While Kulock was mourning, Burns tripped over him, and cracked his old wrinkly skull open. Smithers, who was crushed to see Mr. Burns die, committed suicide by impaling himself on Kulock's dealybob. He died.
Homer, who was now out of a job, wasn't happy. Because even though Burns was a bastard, he did provide Homer with money. And no money, no Donuts... So he decided to pick pocket people, and the first victim was Kulock, who was still mourning over Bunnie. Since Ku doesn't have pockets Homer accidentally grabbed his ass. Kulock grabbed his double barrel shotgun and blew Homer's fat head off. It turned out the Kulock was really MR. BURNS IN DISGUISE. He laughed.
Suddenly, FanBoy got on the scene, and started asking questions, like "Why is Mr. Burns turning into every vital character of the story?" Scott looked at Fanboy, then kicked his ass. Fanboy ran.
After kicking Fanboy's ass, Scott decided to tie up H hog and forcefeed him pure crack cocaine. H went insane, eventually, ate Scott, puked him out, ate him again, shit him out, ate him again, then exploded. H was disgusted and walked out off the Add-on chat. But then he stepped on a land mine.
Oops.
With now not only a big hole in his stomach, H's foot was blown off now too. He finally decided to go to a hospital. At the hostpital, he met Dr. Gigglymen, who said, "DAYAM! YOU'Z ONE FUCKED UP BITCH!" to H. he grabbed his gun, and put him out of his misery. The cops saw him, took away his AMA liscence, and shot him too.
Bob Barker soon came in, and stated "HELP! HELP! Here come the bears!"and indeed, the bears arrived, and ate Scott. Scott shot a hole in the bear's stomach, and crawled out. He shot the bears a few more times for good measure. Then, Scott ate some cheese.
Suddenly, Scott heard a scream. It was Smithers, who was trying to kill himself, but it didn't work, because he found out he was a vampire. So Scott loaded a silver bullet in his gun, and shot Smithers in his nuts. Smithers finally died. Then, Scott ran around, asking people why his Meow Mix won't deliver. Riochet, due to the powers of self instertion, replied PLEASE DON'T LEAVE US!
Riochet and Scott sat down, and ate some cheese. Scott shot Rio in the face, and stole his cheese. Scott then ate Rio's cheese.
THE END
Little did Andre know, that Kulock was secretly plotting revenge against SoSTH, but then, suddenly he needed to go to the toilet. Bad. Kulock, escaping from under the tree, ran to the nearest bathroom. Unfortunately, though, it was occupied by...no-one. However, ROTORO DROPPED THRU THE ROOF! So, the potty was ruined. "Great..." thought Kulock. "Now what'll I do?" So he deducted that he must rough it. Searching for a nice patch of bushes, Kulock happened to bump into Big. Big then said "I gotta drop a log twice as big as you, Kuku-kachoo, shove off!" So he pushed Ku out of the way and went into the bathroom. Kulock then got angry, and got out his WAND OF ENLIGHTENMENT! (Oo, too close for comfort..)
But it was to late, and big crapped on him! Kulock then took his wand of enlightenment, cocked it, aimed it at big, and shot many bullets of enlightenment at his fat ass. With Big dead, nothing could stop Kulock from going to the can to "sit and think". However, he could not think of anything of which to think about. He then got a grand plan to destroy Sonic.
Kulock, while sitting on the can, devising how to destroy Sonic, got a weird feeling on his underside. Bunnie came up from the toilet, and said, "Who wants candy?" Kulock, embarassed, did the only thing he could do. He jumped up, wiped, blushed, and stared at Bunnie drooling, in a lovestruck Pok�mon "Brock"-ish way. He said "Oh Bunnie, I know you got candy, but I sure would like you to lick my lollipop..." while licking his lips. Bunnie slapped him with her robotic hand, and Kulock exploded. Because he felt like it. Anyway, then Scott decided to Watch E.R.! But then when he watched it, he saw Kulock getting dragged in the hospital.
"Go to Knothole!" said the radio. "Whatever." agreed Scott. So he climbed upon Yuji Naka, and rode him like a horse until he got to Knothole. When he got there, he met Rotoro! He liked JUMPIN THRU ROOFS! So he did. Then, Scott sicced Naka on Rotoro. Yuji was pissed off, so he killed the rotor clone. Then he killed the real one. Unfortunately, Naka-sama had gone out of control, and Scott had to put a bullet in him. Scott then heard somebody crying over his death. Alas, it was Burny. Burny was a fire sponge, so Scott ate it. He got heartburn.
But then, Burny turned out to be Mr. Burns, who crawled out of Scotty's stomach, and called Smithers. Smithers then challenged Scott to a duel to the death. Scott was losing when he pulled out his gun, the same that he had used to kill Yuji with, and promptly shot Smithers and Mr. Burns square between the eyes. "Nobody liked that old fart and his pet fag anyway." He said. he was then attacked by an unruly group of Simpsons fans. He got ran over. Flat as a pancake, Scott decided to go on with his opriginal task, going to Kulock at E.R. When he got there, he saw Kulock, doing the monkey! "Kulock! This is no time for dancing, and -- how did they put you back together, I thought you blew up?" "Well, yeah..." said Kulock, "but I was lucky that I was treated by Dr. Magic bean." Magic bean then Killed Scott for no reason.
H-hog then ate Magic Bean. But since magic bean could not be digested, he lived on in H Hog's stomach forever. From inside H Hog, Magic Bean started up the Magic Mean Bean Machine, and magic beans came streaming out of his ass. H Hog, unfortunately, lost his balance by the immense amount of beans exiting his ass and accidentally sat down. With no where for the beans to go, H exploded in a bloody beany mess.
Kulock then exploded. Rlan, pissed off at the predictability of the narrator, killed him with a golf club. But then, Rlan's golf club got bent. "GET BENT!" he said to it, realizing it already was. So he tossed it away, and walked out of the hospital, wondering what he was doing there in the first place. H Hog got up with a big hole in his stomach, and Rlan found a magic bean. "What a nice looking bean you are." and it said, "All the better to get eaten for." So he ate it. Rlan exploded.
Jun Senoue runs in, mourns over Rlan's dead body, and is shot by Neo in Cop form. "That's a 1-30-484-292 violation, mourning over peoples' deaths." Soon after that Neo was president. Because He felt like being president. As president, he made everyone some yummy coconut cream pies. And there was much rejoicing. Then, Leo killed Neo. H Hog was looking the other way, and one last magic bean shot out and killed Leo. H Hog, mysteriously come back to life, proceeded to explode.
Leaving not many characters left, we pick one at random. Pikachu decided to take a walk through a forest. Then he fell down a cliff. While yelling "PIIIIKAAAA....", he fell down towards a messy demise. But just then the floor was there already, and Pikachu's head collided with it. (Like we expected.)
Being the bloody mess that he was, Pikachu proceeded to die in peace. Mourning over him, was Ash Ketchup. Team Submarine then came along and said "Prepare for--" They were stopped by the now regenerated Scott, who'd gone rambo, and was riding in a tank. He blasted Team Submarine and Ash Ketchup in one well placed shot. "OH SHIT! WHERE ARE THE BRAKES?" Scott yelled. Alas, he couldn't find them, and slammed into the cliff and exploded.
But then, the add-on was changed to the friendly fun fun happy show of goodness. Everyone came back to life. Then they started dancing. Then Foggy and Brick came along and got shot by the now regenerated Kulock. "Dammit! This TOTALLY screws over happy fun time!" said the narrator. "Screw Happy Fun Time!" said Ku, before commiting genocide on the magic beans. All of the magic beans died. Happy happy fun time was changed to happy happy kill time. Kulock turned into a crazed axe murderer. He chopped up everyone in sight. Suddenly, in a moment of clumsy dramatism and irony, Kulock slipped, and accidentally sliced Bunnie in half. Kulock was crushed to see he had killed his love.
Except who was actually Mr. Burns, he didn't die by the axe. While Kulock was mourning, Burns tripped over him, and cracked his old wrinkly skull open. Smithers, who was crushed to see Mr. Burns die, committed suicide by impaling himself on Kulock's dealybob. He died.
Homer, who was now out of a job, wasn't happy. Because even though Burns was a bastard, he did provide Homer with money. And no money, no Donuts... So he decided to pick pocket people, and the first victim was Kulock, who was still mourning over Bunnie. Since Ku doesn't have pockets Homer accidentally grabbed his ass. Kulock grabbed his double barrel shotgun and blew Homer's fat head off. It turned out the Kulock was really MR. BURNS IN DISGUISE. He laughed.
Suddenly, FanBoy got on the scene, and started asking questions, like "Why is Mr. Burns turning into every vital character of the story?" Scott looked at Fanboy, then kicked his ass. Fanboy ran.
After kicking Fanboy's ass, Scott decided to tie up H hog and forcefeed him pure crack cocaine. H went insane, eventually, ate Scott, puked him out, ate him again, shit him out, ate him again, then exploded. H was disgusted and walked out off the Add-on chat. But then he stepped on a land mine.
Oops.
With now not only a big hole in his stomach, H's foot was blown off now too. He finally decided to go to a hospital. At the hostpital, he met Dr. Gigglymen, who said, "DAYAM! YOU'Z ONE FUCKED UP BITCH!" to H. he grabbed his gun, and put him out of his misery. The cops saw him, took away his AMA liscence, and shot him too.
Bob Barker soon came in, and stated "HELP! HELP! Here come the bears!"and indeed, the bears arrived, and ate Scott. Scott shot a hole in the bear's stomach, and crawled out. He shot the bears a few more times for good measure. Then, Scott ate some cheese.
Suddenly, Scott heard a scream. It was Smithers, who was trying to kill himself, but it didn't work, because he found out he was a vampire. So Scott loaded a silver bullet in his gun, and shot Smithers in his nuts. Smithers finally died. Then, Scott ran around, asking people why his Meow Mix won't deliver. Riochet, due to the powers of self instertion, replied PLEASE DON'T LEAVE US!
Riochet and Scott sat down, and ate some cheese. Scott shot Rio in the face, and stole his cheese. Scott then ate Rio's cheese.
THE END
